When there’s a doubt in your mind, ‘Cos you think it all the time…

Quote from Death Cab’s You’re A Tourist to get us going today. Pertinent insofar as that I’m utilising it to refer to the staggeringly predictable mental weakness that my beloved Gunners have exhibited this season.

List of Premier League games Arsenal have led in before dropping points:
A – Sunderland 1-1 (led by a goal until stoppage time)
H – Tottenham 2-3 (led by two goals at half time)
A – Wigan 2-2 (led 2-1 until stoppage time)
A – Newcastle 4-4 (led by four goals at half time)
H – Liverpool 1-1 (led in stoppage time… for about 3 minutes)
A – Tottenham 3-3 (led 3-1 until just before half time)

We could be two facepalms ahead with five minutes left and still get beaten by a team with three facepalms... that made sense in my head

Arsene Wenger and Pat Rice rue yet more dropped points...

This is just the League games in which we’ve squandered leads, and also excludes the glorious psychological meltdowns in which we have contrived to lose games in the last minute that we had clawed back level. So the Carling Cup final is (thankfully) avoided… although I mentioned it just there. Shit.

Nonetheless, the evidence clearly points to a team that doesn’t seem to know how to close out games, how to be clinical, how to be ruthless, how to make other teams chase games & tire themselves out to the extent that we can punish them on the counter-attack. The Invincibles team was exemplary at this, but you don’t need to be as other-worldly as they were in order to win games in which you are ahead. Capitalise on the fact that the opposition needs a goal, make them work doubly hard for the ball – if you’re ahead, you don’t need to score, they do, so knock it about and make THEM have some sort of frustrating headfuck.

Words which every Gooner would like to address to the Arsenal players & management

I was going to write some more incredibly insightful, top notch, high quality analysis about the Arsenal’s penchant for repeatedly kicking themselves in the balls (though while we’re on the subject of ‘nads, respect to our unspellable keeper’s Titanium Testicles with which he stopped a fearsomely struck shot from Sandro yesterday) but as a result of my beloved Gunners’ incessant foot-shooting I seem to have been overcome by a wave of ire and melancholy. Irencholy, I call it. Plagiarise to your heart’s content, dear readers.

‘Til next time, Solidarity brothers & sisters…

About Seba Roux

Gooner, Socialist, Historian, Slacker. That's pretty much all you need to know.
This entry was posted in Gibberish, Sport and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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